I believe I got a touch from God and that He gave me my joy back, because when I came out of church, I felt so happy like I didn’t have a care in the world! I had been dealing with depression off and on since my son was born in Aug. 2005. When he was only 4 weeks old all my joy and life energy drained right out of me and I had been struggling to get it back ever since. My family’s financial situation over the last year was also overwhelming me and I was filled with anxiety. But since I left church Sunday last week, the worry and frustration has been gone! I used to dread getting up every morning, but not anymore!

For the first time I really GET IT that GOD IS IN CONTROL AND HE KNOWS MY EVERY NEED. I actually wondered whether He truly cared or if was punishing me and my husband. I know that thought process was seeded by the enemy but when you’re depressed you entertain the worst thoughts. Today however I feel like I’m about to burst with joy and gratitude at what HE has already done. The same power that raised Jesus from the dead is within me! This is another truth that I never really “got” until recently when Pastor Tim taught on this in a sermon, and I’ve been saved and spirit-filled for more than 25 years (since I was 13). PRAISE GOD AND AMEN!

Our income took a severe hit last April (David and I are self-employed). By August we barely had enough to buy groceries and gas. By September we lost the van and by October we had to leave the house. In October while we were clearing out the house I slipped and fell and broke my left ankle. God is good though and greatly to be praised; my ankle has healed up and we’ve been provided a house to stay in and a good vehicle while we work to get our income back up again to where it was in 2008. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving and Christmas with my mother-in-law with plenty to eat and the kids made out like bandits. We learned who our real friends are and realized we have more than we thought. True friends are one of the greatest if not the greatest blessing you can receive from God.

In the midst of all this I realized my skills as a web designer and this year I’ve officially launched myself as a freelance web designer. My business website is www.melodielaylor.com.

I believe 2010 can only get better. My area just saw it’s first snowstorm in 9 years, and it’s the most snow we’ve seen in 20 years. I was used to seeing a few inches of snow every winter growing up and it was strange to have 9 years of sweater weather during what was supposed to be winter. This season has been a real winter. It was like everything had shifted out of balance. Now I feel like things are shifting back again. Praise the Lord!

My pastor is teaching a series on the anointing of the Holy Spirit. He defined the anointing as “the power of God to get results.” I realized something after meditating on that statement over and over. I realized that without “the power of God to get results” one is striving. Striving is working hard without results. To strive means to try (hard) in one’s own strength; to struggle or contend. I realized we’ve been doing things in our own strength, trying to make it on our own, doing things our way and not trusting in the Lord and seeking HIS way.

Some Scriptures to think about:

“And thou say in thine heart, My power and the might of mine hand hath gotten me this wealth. But thou shalt remember the LORD thy God: for it is he that giveth thee power to get wealth, that he may establish his covenant which he sware unto thy fathers, as it is this day.” (Deuteronomy 8:17-18 KJV)

“And it shall come to pass in that day, that his burden shall be taken away from off thy shoulder, and his yoke from off thy neck, and the yoke shall be destroyed because of the anointing.” (Isaiah 10:27 KJV)

“Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the LORD unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts.” (Zechariah 4:6 KJV)

“I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.” (John 15:5 KJV)

Speaking for myself, I must confess that I have serious trust/control issues. It’s in my nature to be suspicious of everyone until they have EARNED my trust. I also want to be in control, even when I have things totally out of control. But I hate to be in charge! Am I mixed up or what? My motto was “Never put your trust in man but in the Lord only.” Only I haven’t been trusting the Lord either, though I thought I was. This year I’ll be working on my inner self a LOT. I forgot what it’s like to walk in the Spirit and spent several years in the flesh (or what some might call the soulish realm). I was focusing inward and on my problems instead of upward towards heaven.

I could keep going on but I’ll just conclude this post by saying that I need the anointing in every aspect of my life. Not just to be an effective Christian witness, but to be effective in my business and in my relationships as wife, mother and friend. I need the Holy Spirit by my side and filling me every day, else my spiritual tank gets empty as it had been for several years.

Now let’s get to the part where God really showed up in a big way. This past Sunday they held the first class of a leadership university at the church. It’s basically a video school; the lectures/classes are on DVD. David is attending the classes but I’m not at this time. One of the lessons Sunday was “The Holy Spirit” by Dr. A.L. Gill. His lesson included teaching on the baptism in the Holy Spirit, and concluded with a chance to pray to receive the baptism. David prayed and received the baptism in the Holy Spirit, and began speaking in an unknown tongue! He’s been a Christian since 1996 and he’s 45 years old. He prayed in the Spirit (in tongues) on the way home from church that night. I wish I had been there to see it.

In an earlier post, What shall I blog about? My Christian walk part 1, I mentioned that I got saved when I was 11, and I rededicated my life to the Lord when I was 13. Shortly after that I also received the baptism in the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues. That milestone revolutionized my walk with the Lord and all the rest of the way through school I was a Jesus freak. I deliberately avoided being “just like everyone else;” I did not want to be a part of the world’s system.

DC Talk – Jesus Freak

I never spoke in tongues around my husband, nor did I talk with him about being baptized in the Holy Spirit, basically because I didn’t know how to approach him with it. I got the idea he thought there was a big hype factor in it, and that the best way for him to come around was to have a spiritual epiphany and experience it for himself. And it happened, and I am in awe and can’t thank the Lord enough. Now I feel we can move forward hand-in-hand together in our Christian walk, as we are both filled with and led by the Spirit.

But I have many more milestones to look forward to. The twins sleeping in big girl beds, then going to the potty on their own. My son and the twins riding their bikes without training wheels. Each of them reading to me instead of me reading to them. More days of no front teeth. Watching them become their own persons. Teaching them about Jesus and the ways of the Lord, then watching them grow in faith. Then PUBERTY and the TEENAGE years (well, I’m not sure I look forward to that period, but I’m hopeful that time in their upbringing will ultimately prove to be very rewarding and we’ll all look back on those years with fondness).

My mom and I accepted Jesus as our personal savior at a large evangelistic crusade when I was 11, back in 1983. That crusade was like nothing either my mom or I had ever seen before. It ran Friday night, Saturday night, and Sunday afternoon. Mom and I went on Sat. and Sun. People were clapping and swaying to very lively music, raising their hands in the air, shouting, crying, some even spoke in tongues (now that was the strangest thing of all). There was a full band on the platform with singers. It was called praise and worship. After the praise and worship everyone was told to greet each other and total strangers would turn around and give us bear hugs while more music was being played. Then we’d sit down, an offering was taken and there was another song or two with a solo vocalist. By this time at least an hour had passed. Then there came the preaching, which was powerful, often loud, and lasted for about another hour. That was followed by an altar call for people to come forward and accept Jesus as their Savior. Afterwards in the Sunday service there was a call for those who were already saved to come forward and receive the baptism in the Holy Spirit (with the evidence of speaking in other tongues).

When I entered 7th grade (junior high) and turned 12, I “backslid”. I wanted so much to be liked by everyone and have friends that I even said to my peers “No, I’m not a Christian!” However, I never really fit in with my classmates anyway because many of them (girls in particular) were already established in a clique and being “cool” by wearing certain brand names and styles and listening to rock music if you were white (or Michael Jackson and Prince if you were black) was essential to acceptance by one’s peers. My parents didn’t have much money – my dad was on disability and my mom got injured on the job and subsequently lost her job when I was in 6th grade. I wore thrift store and Kmart clothes, not Jordache, Calvin Klein, Members Only and Nike. My teeth were crooked and my parents could not afford braces for me. My mom was very strict and old-fashioned and didn’t let me go hang out at the mall or at other kids’ houses. Both years of junior high were emotionally painful for me, but 7th grade was perhaps the worst year of my life. I was made fun of and called names almost daily. I ate lunch alone most of the time.

While I was in 7th grade my mom and I started going to a local Assemblies of God (Pentecostal) church. From the time I started seeking acceptance by my peers in 7th grade the guilt settled in because I wasn’t abiding in Christ. The truth is, I came forward to accept Jesus mostly because the “fear of God” was preached into me, i.e. I was afraid either the Rapture would occur and I’d be left behind, or I’d die in an accident and end up in Hell. Afterwards, when I started hearing the Gospel message regularly on TV and in church, I had trouble sleeping at night because I was still afraid the Rapture was going to occur and I’d miss it. Probably a lot of people, particularly in those days, accepted Christ for that reason, neither having counted the cost, nor understood what repentance truly is, nor come to know the depth of Jesus’ love for all of us (and can we ever fully grasp it this side of Heaven?) That evangelistic crusade was actually the FIRST TIME EVER I had heard the Gospel. I had only been to church a handful of times in my life, and that message was not preached in any service I had ever attended before. I actually count the beginning of my Christian walk starting at age 13. That’s when I really dedicated my life to the Lord. But I’ll get to that in my next post.

So where was my dad in all this? He wasn’t interested. He grew up in the 1930s and 1940s going to an old-time Pentecostal Holiness church and had enough. That was back in the days of big hair buns, no makeup, long sleeves and dresses, etc. He couldn’t help but hear when my mom had televangelists like Jimmy Swaggart on TV in the house, but he wouldn’t go to church with mom and me. My dad *did* go with us Saturday to the crusade, and he spent much of the time outside the auditorium in the lobby of the coliseum smoking cigarettes. He said when we got out that night that the whole place was rocking and swaying to the music, LOL.

(stay tuned for part 2)